Creating your wedding guest list can be a tricky process! You need to consider your budget, venue capacity and most importantly, be able to agree with your fiancé about who you want to share in your special day.
Getting started on your list
- This is a great visual activity that you and your fiancé can do on your own first, then come together to share. Draw a pic of you in the middle of a piece of paper. Add 3 circles around you, similar to a target circle. Label the inner circle A List, the second B List and last circle C List.
- Next, read each other’s target circles and tick choices you agree with in A or B circles. Add any 'have to invites' now into your A Listers circle.
There are the obvious 'A' Listers or 'have to invite' guests but outside of these here are some considerations:
- Think carefully about your budget and venue capacity
- Invite colleagues, team or club mates ONLY if you are friends outside of these organisations
- Consider inviting only close extended family members
- Consider not inviting children
- You don't have to invite people just because they invited you to their wedding
- Invite guests you believe will be part of your combined future!
A Listers - Definite's
Guests you have strong connections with, solid long term friends or family members you love being around.
B Listers - Probable's
Guests you are close to but not so intimately connected with.
C Listers - Maybe's
Guests you would enjoy having there but their presence is not crucial.
The 5 Rules of Engagement:
- I am feeling calm :)
- I can read my partners target circle without criticising
- I can question his/her choices kindly and be open about why he/she made that choice.
- I can agree to ‘park’ a guest to discuss later if I can’t agree
- I am negotiable!
Possible No to 'plus one'
- Your guest is in a new relationship
- The partner of work colleagues, team or club mates
Possible Yes to 'plus one'
- A parent who does not have a partner or spouse
- Your bridal party members in long term relationships
- Consider guests who don’t know anyone
Ideas to keep everyone happy:
- Invite your ABC Listers to your engagement party and let everyone know you are only having a small wedding
- Have a post wedding party with your ABC Listers
- Send out your invitations and remember that typically only 80- 90% will be able to make it which gives you room to invite others.
Finally, consider what many couples are doing by choosing to put their hard earned money towards their honeymoon or house deposit. Put on a cool little wedding and invite just your A Listers!
Emma | iDo iDo Ltd